Do You Have The Courage To Forgive Yourself?

 Photo by Julia Breckenreid

We all make mistakes.

It’s part of the process of being human. There is no such thing in our history as a person that didn’t make any mistakes.

When we are in a state of joy, we are able to function at peak levels of mental and physical performance.

When we become aware of the mistakes we make we can often become filled with guilt and remorse. Though it is OK to feel this way as an impetus for changing our ways. It is not healthy when we stay in this mental state. Guilt and sadness cause us to be dysfunctional mentally and physically.

It is often said that there is no success without failure.That being said in order to succeed you must be able to move past your mistakes. You have to have the courage to learn from the mistake and then move on.

In Judaism there is a 4 step process of repentance the idea is that once you go through the process you can move forward with an open mind and heart.

I feel the approach can be beneficial regardless of your belief system.

The 4 Step Process:

Step 1- Regret. This is where you have the opportunity to realize the impacts of your action, the frustration,
damage or negative impact that you caused. At this point it is good if you feel sadness/frustration
for your mistake. Before you move on to the next step make sure you have really internalized the
mistake, and that your regret is sincere.

Step 2- Confession. Verbally state the mistake that you made. Don’t be vague about it either. The
more articulate you can be the greater your ability to be truly aware of your
mistake and to avoid making the same mistake again.

Step 3- Forgiveness. Again this is something that you speak out loud. If you beleive in a higher
reality that is involved in your life then you can ask that essence for forgiveness.
If the mistake you made was against another person, you should ask that person for
forgiveness. And yes, you should also ask your self for forgiveness. Receiving
forgiveness from others and forgiving yourself is a message that you should let
the mistake move from your present to your past and begin the process of
moving courageously forward.

Step 4 – Resolution.  This is where you make a firm commitment not to repeat the mistake in the future.
Again this should be a verbal commitment. When you speak something out loud you give
it substance. It engraves itself in your mind and our heart.

At this point you have to take the courageous step, and Let It Go.

You have dealt with the issue and now it is time to move forward towards success. It is time to clear your mind of sadness and frustration and return to your positive mental state.

All the best,

Rob

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